Our bedrooms will ideally feel like an embrace; our “nest” enfolding itself around us.
As Human Beings (humans being) what we all we need, at a primal level, is to feel loved, seen and heard, and nurtured. In tending then, to this most private area of our homes, this begins with having compassion for and loving, ourselves. Creating an environment in which we feel safe, supported and enfolded, feeds into our sense of belonging and acceptance.
Bedrooms are key to supporting our relationships
In our homes, a key area to address, to enhance our energy, is the bedroom. Our bedrooms are where we retreat to for what I call the 3 R’s – Rest, Recuperation and Romance. Your bedroom needs to feel soft, nest-like, (mothering and nurturing). It should soothe the senses with soft, tactile fabrics, beautiful imagery, comforting scents and soft lighting. Fragrant homeliness is the order of the day. That safe pair of arms to run into after a day “playing” outside.
Creating a warm enfolding ambience
Ask yourself, what does that look like for you? More importantly, how would that FEEL for you! Feel the feeling first, then create that in your environment. Be aware of the imagery and ornaments in this area of the home, it is good to have pairs of things here rather than solitary images.
The last thing you see at night and the first thing you see in the morning impacts on your dream-state and how you feel as you begin every day. Go with your gut feeling for what feels appropriate to represent what it is you want to attract in your relationships. But remember, that you are also in relationship with yourself and support your own energy, first, here. What elements can you add to enhance your sense of being enfolded, protected and nurtured? Ideally, your bedroom should feel like a warm embrace.
Form and Function
In feng shui we first begin with good “form”. Always ensuring we feel fully backed up and supported as we rest and rejuvenate. To this end the ideal position for your bed is to have your head to a solid wall with the support of a good solid headboard (as opposed to a slatted or open one). Ideally the bed will be off-line with the door into the room while affording the occupier a view of the door and the window. This is the “command and control” position and allows your energy to feel protected and enfolded which supports restful sleep.
Where two people are sharing a bedroom, there will ideally be equal space on either side of the bed and a matching pair of lockers and lamps to symbolise equality and balance in the relationship. The lockers should have rounded or bull-nosed edges or be lower than the height of the mattress to avoid “cutting chi” which is unsettling for your energy.
There is a polarity between the energy or our relationships with others and the energy of inner contemplation (our relationship with self and with spirit), in that, our relationships with others always result from how we carry them within ourselves. The overall atmosphere of our bedrooms should support restful sleep and relaxation. This allows us to release stress and tension and open up to all new possibilities as we enter our dreamstate and as we begin every day.
Scent is of course, deeply personal. We are each drawn to particular scents based on our memories and associations with particular scents. Add some Fragrant chi to your bedroom by dispersing some pure essential oils to enhance this energy of nurturing relationships and romance.
Here are some examples of oils which support calm serenity and loving nurturing energy:-
Jasmine, links the base, heart and crown chakras, warms the heart and balances our energy. It is said to instil optimism and fun, positive energy. It has also been associated with the goddess of the moon, and Egyptian mother goddess ISIS, who held the secrets of fertility, magic and healing (Gabriel Mojay).
Benzoin, which is soothing, stabilising and nurturing. Associated with Venus, the planet of love, its warm, sweet, nourishing quality feeds our own ability to nurture and comfort both ourselves and others.
Melissa officianalis, also known as “hearts delight”, encourages gentle strength and fearless serenity. Its lemony, honey sweet fragrance has an association with “mothering” our inner child and supporting our emotional well-being. It instils us with a sense of serenity, trust and inner stability.
Read more about feng shui for bedrooms and each area of your home in my book “A Place to Call Home”